Wednesday, October 10, 2007

The Sewing Machine Saga

Here is the very long and corrupt story of my quest for a new sewing machine. As I have previously discussed on my blog, my old Singer sucked. Nothing personal but it was very old and a very base model. Not really cut out for todays quilting! The quilt store where I am taking my quilting classes, well they sell and service Pfaff machines. I sewed on one last week at my class and after sewing on my Singer, which sews and sounds like a go-cart, sewing on this Pfaff was a dream! I want to quilt and machine embroider so I wanted (needed!) a new machine that could do just that.

The good news is that Pfaff has just come out with a brand spanking new swanky model. Well, lots of quilters want the new model so they trade up~ selling their old model and then apply that towards the purchase of the new model. I certainly don’t need a top of the line high dollar machine right now as a novice quilter but a used older model would be perfect. So I dropped a little hint to hubs that I was in dire need of a new machine. I also explained that the new models had come out and they cost more than some cars... ”but of course I don’t need a new one dear because they have some wonderful pre-loved ones, and they are much less expensive, that would be perfect for me!” At “much less expensive” his ears perked. That was hint #1.

Then I thought next I’ll bribe him. Hub’s father, a kind and generous man, passed away 2 years ago. Hubs then inherited a lot of.....paperwork!!!! Hubs is NOT really so very organized, and just downright does not like, despises in fact, paperwork. I am not OCD about it but to avoid clutter I like all of our personal paperwork filed away neatly. Then if and when I need to refer to something I know exactly where it is. Well, when all of hubs paperwork from his Dad’s estate started rolling in I told him I did not want any part of that and he would have to organize it! Otherwise when some important something or other came up missing then hubs would blame me and my otherwise flawless filing system when actually what he was hunting for would end up being in his briefcase! So for the past 2 years all of this mail piles up on the bar in the kitchen. Then I would put in a file folder for him and put it on the counter in the laundry room. Then I started dating those folders and piling them in boxes in the closet. Then when tax time rolls around hubs sits a the kitchen table surrounded by helter skelter stacks of papers and sighs pitifully with his head in his hands.

A few months ago he said “What if I hired you to be my secretary?” Well I knew the depths of his mess and I, kindly, said “No way Jose`, you have got to organize that stuff yourself buster. There is not enough money in the world for me to want to take on that project!” Well fast forward to this week and the idea of organizing a few papers and getting paid was sounding like a grand idea! So I said “I will organize all of your paperwork and you will never again be frustrated by all of that mess you created! Now, you only have to pay me $6 a day for one year, payable upfront! That is less than minimum wage let me tell you!” Being my husband, well he knew exactly what I was up to and rolled his eyes.

So it was on. I decided to show him just exactly how wonderful I was! I took stacks and piles and boxes and weeded out trash, had a “to shred” pile that was 2 feet high. When it was all said and done I had neatly color coded all of his “stuff” and the end product fit easily into one drawer of the filing cabinet! All of that mess and headache when organized turned into one little drawer! Am I good or what?

Well he was thrilled and I said ok pay up dude, payment is due in full! He said no this is a “for better or worse” thing. You just helped me out of the worse! Such a fine wife you are! Wha....What??? I need payment in full....I need my sewing machine!!

Not to worry I had one last ace in the hole. A little reminder of why it would be ok for me to have a new machine. I hope you readers don’t at this point perceive me as a spoiled, scheming, manipulative wife. You see there are other issues here. Quilting is a hobby, yes? Just a little hobby. So let me share with you about hub’s little hobby. I’ll throw in pictures just for giggles!

Team roping. I'll give you the layman's city girl explanation of what exactly that is for those of you who don’t know. In team roping a steer runs and two men on horses chase it. One of the men (the header) ropes the head and then the other man (the healer) ropes the back feet. This is a timed event, with the goal being accomplishing this quickly! There, now you know.

So hubs team ropes. Naturally you need horses.

This Leo. Handsome isn't he? Fast too.

This is Josie. She is a lover. You can't get away from her! She just wants to rub her head on you and sniff you! She is fast too!

Here we have Colonel. He is a beauty.

Here is Max. He is fat!

And if you have a little land, then you have a roping arena at your house so you need these punks...

Granted they do their fair share of “mowing and fertilizing” but I personally would like to see them in my freezer for a years worth of dinners!!!!

Anyway, both the horses and steers have to eat.

Oh please you say, what is a little hay?

What about this?

And then there is this!

Of course you have to build a barn to shelter the little darlings from the elements....

Hello barn!

So when you go to roping somewhere else you have to load your horses up in a trailer. Not just any trailer would do for hubs "hobby"...

That folks is like carrying your horses in a dad gum Bentley! Then there are living quarters inside, you know in case you have to spend the night at a roping. The living quarters are like the Taj Mahal! It is like this horse trailer has been on MTV's "Pimp my Ride"!!!

There, wasn't that fun?? Now if we are purely talking hobbies, both hubs and mine, apples to you see why I felt NO guilt about wanting a new machine???

Just a little brand "new to me" sewing machine like this....

There she is!!!! Yipppeeee my precious machine!!! The quilts are going to be rolling off that thing!!!!

All joking aside, hubs did say (after I painstakingly organized his disaster of paperwork) "You don't ask for a lot. So if this machine will make you happy, then I want you to have it" Awwwwwww, he is so sweet! He is a good, kind, peach of a husband, who works very hard to provide for his family so if he likes to rope and we can still put food on the table then that is fine with me! I didn't say I won't tease him about it though!! I love him and I'll go ahead and keep him. I love my new Pfaff too!!!!


Lori E. said...

Another edge of the seat, what is going to happen entry......I KNEW the ending all along. Your hubby is just putty in your hands. WAY TO GO GIRL!!!!!

Mary said...

You sure have that man figured out. MEN! We can all get them to do what we want them to. Now as long as we know that and they don't we're good to go!!!

kristen lewis said...

Well done, you scheming and somewhat manipulative vixon! Congratulations on your new baby! Now I will be expecting a quilt as a gift in the near future!